So who are these "boys girls", and just what is considered as a boys girl?
The boys girl know's how to act in any situation whether it involves boys and girls, or in the higher sense if its just boys. They know how to be sexy and yet very casual, know just the right things to say, know how to giggle in the right places, are always with the boys and always treated with a huge degree of importance.
Having always been a girly girl and most likely always will be, there is something that I just cant shrug off about this genre of women. I guiltily feel aggravated at how amazing they seem and yet at the same time very envious.
Take my personal account of how I came to meet this boy crowder.....
Picture the scene...first party with my new boyfriend's closest mates..and he has a lot! I cant count how many times Iv'e been at a party where I wasn't quite feeling it. I'll be the first to admit I'm not the most social of butterflies at times, its harder for some than others to adjust and relax in social situations, especially if it involves new faces and of both men and women. Being 25 id like to think I could be myself in any circumstance, however trying win over your boyfriend's mates as possibly being your mates too, appears to be harder for us more girl's girls. I mean how do you appear enthusiastic about the new x-box game or a classic gangster movie quote?! This is where my girlyness appears excessively and my mind panics! I fidget for a while and force a laugh with them, "what the hell are they going on about?! ermm just laugh Corinne laugh....they may accept you!" I tell myself.
So in this rather anxious affair, I usually reach for another vodka and quickly text my sister for advice and a possible whinge! As I calm and the vague feeling of tipsyness runs through my anxiety ridden body. I begin to feel quite comfortable sitting back and just listening to the conversations flow, while quickly handing my brain some positive affirmations!! Suddenly there seems to a be a cuffufle, people hugging and welcoming at the door. Entering the testosterone filled lounge is possibly the prettiest girl I may have seen, wearing something I could and would probably never wear. Instantly for most of us girls, insecurity begins to take hold. I smile and politely say hello, recieving a slight warm return, quickly before "hey!! lets drink..." to 3 of the nearest men. Its strange to watch, this girl appears to have it all, its as if they all seem the best of friends. I see no outward sexual desire or dirty jokes from either parties, I think there maybe something genuine here. As they hand her the drinks and start to play drinking games, its like the party didn't start without her. She is instantly at ease with them, coming up with any topic and the guys are all ears. My earlier remarks on classic films seem failure in comparison to this chick!... They laugh hysterically with her, even with her mildly "blonde" quotes.
Now it might seem this is all my own pre-conceptions, or my own insecurity, and to a point I would agree there is a little of that green envy hanging around somewhere! Having admittedly stalked a few of her facebook posts and photos...and maybe quotes.! this girl is the perfect" boys girl"! Hundreds of photos with boys at parties, bbq's, hell even one at my own home! Her quotes and posts seem to relate to rock, indie, swearing and sex...and with one click of her "send" button the boys are replying like dogs on heat!
I notice that while she may be popular with what appears to be every guy on this planet, there are very few girl mates listed as friends, or in her photos. I begin to wonder if this girl actually does "have it all"?.
I write this blog as not only me myself has come to witness this breed, but also for the familiarity it holds within other females I meet.
Iv'e spent so long trying to be like this girl, but Iv'e never got there,Iv'e spent so long trying to figure out how can I be like her, how can I be accepted by my boyfriends male friends? what do I have to prove?.
And then it hit me. The questions were thrown back - Do I actually want to be like her? do i really need to be so accepted by everybody?
The answer came in a series of usual brain bafflement! The moments where I have to challenge my own emotions over my mind, my own values over others.
In all of this wonder at these extraordinary female beings, my conclusion became plain and simple. No!!
I have nothing to prove!
We are all different, we can all kick ass as females. We all have one amazing thing in common...we are women! we do shopping amazingly well and we know a lot more than men! Getting on better with the male species more than females and vice versa shouldn't seperate us, or make us feel any less of a person. I grew up with a sister and a family full of girls, I learnt about how to be a girl and girly in my own nature very quickly. With boys...hmmm..its has been a slower process!!
Girls will be girls and boys will boys, but who says girls cant be" boys girls", and boys cant be "girls boys"?! after all I wouldn't trade a day in my trackys, uber comfy Uggs and my boyfriends hoody for a pair of stilettos and ultra high mini!!
So maybe next time this young male enticing lassie pops up in my Facebook, or even at the Christmas party I will not be intimidated. The little green eyed monster will not appear because acceptance gives me the peace I need within myself. I too simply will prance around in my LBD, with my boyfriend at my side. Cos after all I may be a girl's girl, but who says that's all I am?!!
Having always been a girly girl and most likely always will be, there is something that I just cant shrug off about this genre of women. I guiltily feel aggravated at how amazing they seem and yet at the same time very envious.
Take my personal account of how I came to meet this boy crowder.....
Picture the scene...first party with my new boyfriend's closest mates..and he has a lot! I cant count how many times Iv'e been at a party where I wasn't quite feeling it. I'll be the first to admit I'm not the most social of butterflies at times, its harder for some than others to adjust and relax in social situations, especially if it involves new faces and of both men and women. Being 25 id like to think I could be myself in any circumstance, however trying win over your boyfriend's mates as possibly being your mates too, appears to be harder for us more girl's girls. I mean how do you appear enthusiastic about the new x-box game or a classic gangster movie quote?! This is where my girlyness appears excessively and my mind panics! I fidget for a while and force a laugh with them, "what the hell are they going on about?! ermm just laugh Corinne laugh....they may accept you!" I tell myself.
So in this rather anxious affair, I usually reach for another vodka and quickly text my sister for advice and a possible whinge! As I calm and the vague feeling of tipsyness runs through my anxiety ridden body. I begin to feel quite comfortable sitting back and just listening to the conversations flow, while quickly handing my brain some positive affirmations!! Suddenly there seems to a be a cuffufle, people hugging and welcoming at the door. Entering the testosterone filled lounge is possibly the prettiest girl I may have seen, wearing something I could and would probably never wear. Instantly for most of us girls, insecurity begins to take hold. I smile and politely say hello, recieving a slight warm return, quickly before "hey!! lets drink..." to 3 of the nearest men. Its strange to watch, this girl appears to have it all, its as if they all seem the best of friends. I see no outward sexual desire or dirty jokes from either parties, I think there maybe something genuine here. As they hand her the drinks and start to play drinking games, its like the party didn't start without her. She is instantly at ease with them, coming up with any topic and the guys are all ears. My earlier remarks on classic films seem failure in comparison to this chick!... They laugh hysterically with her, even with her mildly "blonde" quotes.
Now it might seem this is all my own pre-conceptions, or my own insecurity, and to a point I would agree there is a little of that green envy hanging around somewhere! Having admittedly stalked a few of her facebook posts and photos...and maybe quotes.! this girl is the perfect" boys girl"! Hundreds of photos with boys at parties, bbq's, hell even one at my own home! Her quotes and posts seem to relate to rock, indie, swearing and sex...and with one click of her "send" button the boys are replying like dogs on heat!
I notice that while she may be popular with what appears to be every guy on this planet, there are very few girl mates listed as friends, or in her photos. I begin to wonder if this girl actually does "have it all"?.
I write this blog as not only me myself has come to witness this breed, but also for the familiarity it holds within other females I meet.
Iv'e spent so long trying to be like this girl, but Iv'e never got there,Iv'e spent so long trying to figure out how can I be like her, how can I be accepted by my boyfriends male friends? what do I have to prove?.
And then it hit me. The questions were thrown back - Do I actually want to be like her? do i really need to be so accepted by everybody?
The answer came in a series of usual brain bafflement! The moments where I have to challenge my own emotions over my mind, my own values over others.
In all of this wonder at these extraordinary female beings, my conclusion became plain and simple. No!!
I have nothing to prove!
We are all different, we can all kick ass as females. We all have one amazing thing in common...we are women! we do shopping amazingly well and we know a lot more than men! Getting on better with the male species more than females and vice versa shouldn't seperate us, or make us feel any less of a person. I grew up with a sister and a family full of girls, I learnt about how to be a girl and girly in my own nature very quickly. With boys...hmmm..its has been a slower process!!
Girls will be girls and boys will boys, but who says girls cant be" boys girls", and boys cant be "girls boys"?! after all I wouldn't trade a day in my trackys, uber comfy Uggs and my boyfriends hoody for a pair of stilettos and ultra high mini!!
So maybe next time this young male enticing lassie pops up in my Facebook, or even at the Christmas party I will not be intimidated. The little green eyed monster will not appear because acceptance gives me the peace I need within myself. I too simply will prance around in my LBD, with my boyfriend at my side. Cos after all I may be a girl's girl, but who says that's all I am?!!
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